everyone has posted their new year's resolutions except me. i posted one last year (as in for 2008) and i've not post my 2009's. here i am to type my late new year's resolution!

1. not to procrastinate
2. help my brother in his studies
3. study well
4. bake a cheesecake for mum and dad's anniversary which is about in a few days' time
5. love my family more
6. change myself
7. not to neglect God as much as usual
8. love my friends more
9. not to complain too much about school *smacks self*
10. not to live in denial
11. go for a party
12. to celebrate my birthday with my friends
13. to have someone like Edward Cullen
14. bake cupcakes with Jasmine and Jane
15. have Jasmine and Jane to sleepover
16. have more money!
17. understand and love myself better

i just don't understand myself ._. who does?



seriously, i need a life now. but i don't know where to find it. i am getting more lazy as time passes by and i am neglecting my books away when spm is coming so soon.

high school is coming to its end this year. and college will come up next. sometimes i just want to stay in kindergarten and not move on.

talking about kindergarten...i can remember those girls. there's this girl...let us know her as A (i can't remember her name at all). A liked bullying me, although i've never did anything to her. i've never tried to fix things back like now, so, who cares, right? then someday, i was playing around the 'playground' and i was running. but who knows i knocked into her and she fell. and the best part was, i didn't even know that i knocked her down. and now, i thought to myself, "is that the return of her bullying me so much?" sometimes, i still think of it whether did i knock her down because i didn't feel anything. how mean i was.

and when i was going to kindergarten, i had this neighbour who played with me everyday without fail. hm, we were kids, o-kay? i used to call her as my best friend. i miss her a lot, but recently when i pass my previous house, her house has a lot of long grasses, and obviously she has moved out. but i don't know where she is now. i can never forget her name - Ngam Mei San.

o there's another girl. we were close to each other, and if i am not mistaken, she's a year younger than me. because she was smarter than the others, she gets to skip a class. i can't remember her name but i still remember her surname - Ho. we got drifted away because i beat her. o she got her dad to settle it too lol. and that beating was like a playing one but she took it seriously so, goodbye to that friendship.



sometimes, i wished i have come to wms since form 1. i couldn't go because of some problems. not some. it was a problem. if you've been wondering why was i desperate to come to wms, it wasn't actually me. my first choice was aism, but my dad said, "why do you want to spend so much for this school? save some money for your college and university." and my second choice was sri cempaka. i got in, and my dad has paid off the first semester fees. but who knows sri cempaka is crazy and called saying "hello sir, our fees have increased and we need you to pay off the remaining half." after some arguments, that lady said, "okay, you pay *inserts number*, can ah?" my dad didn't like that because sri cempaka doesn't have policies. thats what my dad said, so, i couldn't go anymore. then i requested sayfol and fairview. my dad then said, "try emailing them and ask what is their passing rate." i emailed, and the email was failed to be send. gosh, then my dad said, "it's not a good school then."

i was so ._. seriously.

then my dad remembered about wms. i thought i couldn't come to kl anymore, but who knows my dad remembered about wms! then he applied for me and my brother. i got in while my brother couldn't get in.

anyway, yeah i know i complained way too much when i first stepped into wms. i just couldn't move on in life. slowly, i blended in, and yeah here i am. it was hard, but i got through it.

this year, we have shukim from terengganu. and i think she's facing a harder time than i did. i hope she can make it though. it takes a lot of time to blend into the school. sometimes i do think why can't i feel contented at that time. but isn't it too late?

i believe in hope.


sometimes you'll think, why can't you be as happy as this kid?

this wednesday will be my mum and dad's wedding anniversary. and i have to bake 5kg of cake with icing for them ._. thats what my dad said. but i am not going to bake 5kg of cake of course. do you have an idea about how big is 5kg? it's super big! my cake when i was celebrating my 15th birthday was super huge and it was only 2kg? my dad wants me to bake 5kg? gosh!

madam stanley got a cupcake from me and she couldn't believe that my baking experience at that time was 2 weeks old. lol! and madam selva likes my cheese cupcake (: i know it's not sweet of course because my dad doesn't like sweet ones.

carl mann likes chocolate chips but i haven't bake one with chocolate chips for her yet. o carl mann, wait till you come over to li ling's house then i will do one for you. i bought the chocolate chips already but i haven't bake it, yet.

that day in school, when i brought chocolate banana cupcake to school...when they were eating them, zhuo wei sniffed and said, "this smells good." i was laughing because i've not seen anyone sniffing. but my mistake was i didn't put in bananas. my bad. i put in a teaspoon of banana essence and yeah they had the smell, no taste ._.



i think i better get going, because i am going back to seremban later. and i have not finished my homework. looks like i am going to get killed on monday =/

okay, now i remember, i will be tad busy on monday finishing my friday's homework and on top of that, i must bake on monday! for my mum and dad.

that spells D-I-E, no?

Labels: Dear Diary, Reminiscence, School, Thoughts