This i really gotta say it to Chia Su-Yen all over again.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SU-YEN! Damn, you're 16 years old now. Heck, i wish i am 16 now too. I know, its the age that you can ride a motorbike. At least, a motorbike.

Hmm.

This post is dedicated to my close friends and "close" friends (Liss, Jia Huei, Li Li, Li Ling, Carl Mann, etc - like who i hang around with during school hours).

Generally, sorry if i've offended you guys.

My sincerest apologies to all my Wesley mates, who have been ANNOYED listening to the words from the bottom of my heart (which they say, COMPLAINS). I am really, really sorry as i am used of "complaining" to my 7 friends from Puteri.

As i said, you guys won't know me well too much yet.

I am not complaining, but was expressing how i feel because i believe telling what i think and feel makes me feel better.

& for "complaining", i've lost many friends. Yes, even its less than 2 months. Heck, now i feel like i wanna run back to Puteri but i think its unnecessary.

When i am feeling uber down, i don't speak. Because i want to cry my heart out, to let go whatever i'm feeling. Its that you don't understand me. Maybe its too early. Yes Li Ling. You. Whatever you've said on the day i felt down OFFENDED me 'cause i was feeling down, and you made me feel worse.

I wish i have those people like the 7's, who can just hear, and cheer me up. Jane especially. She will make me smile & not make me cry. How sweet. Its not that i regret being in Wesley or what. BUT THIS IS JUST WHAT I THINK.

Its just annoying when someone asked me to tell why i am feeling down, & when i express my feelings, they'll say i am complaining. And sometimes assume that i am sad over a thing-that-i-gave-up-in-caring-about anymore. Heck, i hate those people. Can't they just think how i am (okay maybe not me alone. maybe there's more people who are facing things worst than me) feeling? Sigh.

If you make me feel worse when i am already super duper down, i'll hate you. Okay maybe not hate. I'll get pissed off for some time.

That's also, less than a day.

Corliss Lee, you don't need this anymore as i posted a post about you before new year?

Yap Carl Mann, i am sorry for thinking crapo (a new word). I love you okay? =D (i know you dont love me) &, if you need someone to hear crapos, you can come to me. Although you don't really talk much with me anymore, i don't mind, 'cause i know you have your own reasons to. I know it's me. Sorry.

Tan Li Li, i am sorry for "complaining" too. Okay. I was complaining, i guess. Okay. I WAS. I know lah sometimes i compare, but, thats also sometimes now. I used to compare a lot, right? Sorry lah for hearing.

JoLim, THANKS FOR ABUSING ME.

Chiew Li Ling, i am sorry too, okay? =D I know lah sometimes we homo sapiens humans don't mean to say something that might offend others, so i forgive you because you're there everyday, when i need you (although you offend me & i offend you sometimes. its normal right?). I love you Li Ling. I really do.

Chong Jia Huei, thanks for laughing with me =D & create nonsense, and talk nonsense, and laugh together. (L)

If i didn't mention your name here, i am really sorry 'cause i can't remember all the names becase i keep on forgetting. Yes i am old. Generally (again), i am sorry if i offended you guys. I mean it ok.

To the 7's, i really miss you guys.

* i guess this is the last post before the exam. (yeah, right) wait till my exam is over, then i will post a longer one okay? =D & i thought of deleting my blog already. but i am still considering about this. opinions?




Oh, sorry if i offended anyone especially Li Ling 'cause i posted about her in this post. Sorry x100 ok.

Labels: Depression, Thoughts

I woke up at 10.15am this morning, just to prepare myself to meet them at my place and LiLing's. I wanted to call McD right after i wake up, but, i am afraid if there's any changes so i didn't call. 15 minutes after i woke up, i called Liling, to reconfirm everything. She was all, "WHAT THE HECK, you haven't call!?"

Hmm. I don't think it's that late anyway. After LiLing and i stopped talking on the phone, i straightaway called McD delivery service within a few minutes. After ordering, for like maybe 15 minutes? LiLing brought Xin Ying and Jing Xuan to my place. Oh her cousins joined us too. She picked them up from the LRT station and came to my place after that. After lingering at my place for a short while (for maybe less than 10 minutes?), we then go to LiLing's place.

Heck, her place is like so bloody spacious. It's way neater than my place. It's a good place to be at to practice ballet. *smiles*

We couldn't stand our hunger any longer then we ate our McD. After eating, we then go to the playground to play. *sweat* I know, we're going to be 16 years in age and we're still playing at the playground. We're kids at heart wtf. But thats true, right!? =D

The pool is so tempting that we were becoming more impatient. =/

I couldn't take the temptation anymore and i just texted Corliss and Jo like heck. Slowly, i remembered Jia Huei. I was like..."someone's missing." Then someone hit my mind with Jia Huei. Without waiting for another second, i texted Jia Huei asking where is she and all. Halfway texting, i thought for another second, "heck, if i text, it'll take another whole 10 minutes to wait. so, i think i better call her now," then i called. Then the conversation came like this; (Jia Huei, Yuenmay)

Hello Jia Huei, where are you?
Uh hmm...
What? Where are you?
KL?
Woi Jia Huei, KL is so big! So please, be specific.
Oh okay...hmm...i don't know.
*sweat* How can you not know where you are?
It's because i don't know where is this place!
Fine, text me when you reach.

*sweat betul sweat*

And nonsense came up and all. There's this part when Corliss didn't want to change, because she brought a bikini. *SWEAT x2* Then i got to like, lend her my shirt so she could wear it over for the whole period of swimming. So in the pictures that you'll soon see...shows that Corliss was wearing my shirt.

We started swimming and i was quite...i don't know...i was waiting for Jia Huei's text all the time.

JoLim is the camerawoman and a big-huge-fat bully. JoLim likes to push us down to the pool! Forever! She's mean, right? Jo, you suck for that & yet i still love you, as a new friend. *smiles*

She took lots of pictures, using my phone. She became the camerawoman for a short while as she got to leave early. Sigh.

JoLim, you better stay longer next time okay? =D

After JoLim left, we played monkey in the pool. Heck, when we were happily playing, a gay lord/gay guard guard came and screw us off for being noisy, and our inproper attire (Corliss and i were in our proper attire okay!). LiLing argued and we could afford to laugh. She was saying that we wear clothes over because we are shy, because there's a guy around. That is what made me laugh. She was arguing like heck, seriously.

After our monkey game, we played Truth Or Dare as LiLing wanted to play this game. It's so funny man! Seriously. All sorts of questions were asked. We played 2 rounds only, because the time was limited. The questions i got was;

1) Which would i rather choose to get married with?
a) a guy named A got dick cancer;
b) a guy named B got no sperms.

WTF RIGHT! Corliss was like telling me to choose B because its better with no cancer. MY throat was drying off because of LiLing.

2) Have you touched a condom before?
a) yes;
b) no.

SWEAT. I laughed before i answered. I choose B, because i really did not touch it before. LiLing has a really creative mind, right? Lingi, Lingi.

After that game, we went back to shower. We broke into half - Jia Huei and Corliss came to my house wherelse Jing Xuan and Xin Ying went to LiLing's house.

After our shower, we ate instant noodles. 6 packets of it! I guess Corliss and i ate the most. Or maybe not. Jing Xuan, Xin Ying, Corliss, Jia Huei and i ate it. From then i knew that Corliss is not quite health conscious. She is the same as Kumuta. They are really...alike! Corliss was saying that instant noodles is not good, and she doesn't like it because of health reasons. Sigh. Oh well. She is so freaking skinny anyway. You should see her feet.

Slowly, one by one went back. Since i've to drop Jing Xuan and Xin Ying at the LRT station, i thought i could follow them too, as i've yet to buy the ticket for my February transport. Heck, it's RM100, but i didn't buy the RM100 one, instead, i bought the RM50 card.

I went home after that. Although i feel tired today, i am still happy, somehow.

To the people who came today: thanks for coming today! Because without you guys today, i would feel bored the whole freaking day. =D Thank you very much guys! Y

Pictures ahead. (I know Weeru loves this!) Oh yeah, click on your desired picture for a larger view.






















This picture is up because it's a dare for Jing Xuan to do that.

Thats for the day! =D

PS: Sigh, i've to go to school tomorrow! & i'll be uber lonely as Carl Mann will be back from Penang just tomorrow and not today. Sigh. She'll only go to school on Tuesday. So lonely. BUT! JoLim will be with me for Physics! =D

PPS: People please believe me. Corliss's the one who bullies me all the time. I am innocent. Oh yah you know what? Corliss's parents look young, seriously. They look like...Corliss's older siblings. *sweat* No, i am not praising your parents, Corliss. They do look young! Way younger from my parents.

Anyway i love you guys.





Gosh. I've a problem now. Should i go for the in-house scouts camp this Friday? The camp, or food on Saturday? Ah. Sigh. After new year, i'll go and have some jabs already. Gosh it's heart breaking. I hate injections for ever. Other than that, i'll also go for a dentist checkup too. It has been centuries years since my last visit to the dentist. I know - what the heck.

Labels: Friends, Unforgettable

PS: This post is dedicated to my 'close' friends from WMS.

For some reason, i am starting to LOVE school. I mean WMS. Thanks to my friends - Liss, Ling, Carl Mann, Li Li, Jo, Jia Huei and a few others who gave me the feeling of happiness in school, and not make me feel lonely. Although i feel left out most of the time. So, i should thank Liss the most. She cares for others more than herself.

To Corliss Lee GoldFish Ching Yi: I love you, Lissi. I really do love you for all the things you've said, for all the things you've done to make me feel happier than the first few days of school. Thanks a lot, Corliss. YYY

She tries without giving up to make me happy, when i am feeling totally down. That's even when she's not happy herself. Such a good friend huh? She is. She still talks to me about everything and anything when i start talking about everything and anything just to keep me companied. She replaces about...7 good friends of mine from the previous school, for real.

1) Jasmine - for being close to me.
2) Jane - for talking about everything and anything to me.
3) Weeru - for being cute.
4) Kumuta - for being a little health conscious. (i know Kumuta's VERY health conscious.)
5) Geraldine - a bag of bones and eats a lot. (i swear Corliss is skinny like heck!)
6) Katherine - for being mean sometimes.
7) Joyce - for mumbling/singing songs and being cute.

Whenever she does them, they'll pop up in my head automatically like magic. That is why, i don't whine about missing school anymore. It is simply because she quite replace you guys in school already. =D So i won't whine over you guys, and start crying in school during breaks or anywhere.

Corliss's good at advicing, and cracking jokes too. She's good at making me laugh. After making me laugh, she'll laugh too! =D &, she's influenced by me and Jia Huei at laughing at small things like Milo. Which is a good thing!

Sometimes, she makes me laugh when she is not even trying! =D

This is her, Corliss Lee, for those who doesn't know her to see.

I've thought of this since...before this Chinese New Year break started. What i didn't feel comfortable with is the people there, although i am like...used to WMS like i've been there for years. But, i don't think there's any flaws in them, because its in their nature, no? Everyone's annoying, including me. I can't blame them somehow. I know most of the people in WMS dislike me, but i can't say anything much now.

I love you, school.

Although i still miss my previous school, i don't think it's a big deal anyway. What i miss from my previous school is just the 7's and the teachers' selamba character. And that is what i was whining about from the first day of school.

To the rest, i guess your name should be up soon, but not now. Among all of you, Corliss is whom i know since last year? And is the longest?

*i think Lingi's the next? I don't know, it depends. Hmm...maybe the rest too. Oh yeah Lingi, i love you too. =D

Labels: Friends, Thoughts

Is there any professional at Chemistry's formulae thing to help me out?

Balancing,

Plus minus,

Adding numbers.

I don't know what i am talking about, but, i really need help in Chemistry, before i go crazy again like last year.

I don't wanna cry my heart out every morning before going to school just because i don't want to go to school.

Jasmine knows why i didn't want to go to school anymore - i think.

-----

I forgot.

To wish those Chinese i know...

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR.

Red, because of what we Chinese believe in - good luck.

Labels: Uncategorized

I explored my computer files. & i found things like...

Do you remember,
those moments we had?
Had you forget?
When we first knew,
when we first kissed,
when we first held hands.
Don't you miss it?

I do,
my love.

Tell me,
how do you feel now.
I want to know,
because i care.
I want you to be happy.
I'd rather be,
sad.
I'd rather carry your sadness
away from you.

I love you,
my love.
Tell me that you love me.
"Love's the thing we want",
tell me.

My love,
tell me how you are now.
It has been long,
since we've last spoke.

I miss you,
my love.
Why'd you have to go?

When you walked away,
you didn't turn back.
I want to know why so.
Did you feel anything?
I felt it.

I felt sad,
angry,
disappointed.
I felt sour.
I didn't feel sugar.

I wondered,
wondered deeply.
When are you coming back?

Is it good there,
tell me.
I miss those times
when you used to tell me
everything.

Now,
I apologize
for being cold towards
you in the past,
my love.

---

When i cry,
you'll tell me
not to cry.
Because when i do,
you will cry too.
Or when i do,
your heart breaks
into pieces.

You always want me
to be happy,
no matter what happens.
But that
couldn't happen,
because
you left me
with a broken heart
behind.

You said
you wouldn't leave me
anymore.
You broke your promise.
I couldn't
do anything
to stop you
from doing so.

Why did you break them?
You said,
you didn't mean it.
To me,
you didn't even care
about
the promises we made.

Eventually,
you broke my heart
even more.
Who's going
to mend it?
No one is.

Thank you,
for acting
like you cared.
But in fact,
without me knowing,
you don't care.

---

There's like 2 of them. I wonder whether did i wrote them myself? Or its from somewhere? I used to copy and paste lots of things.

I can't recall anything.

As i said, i have a short term memory.

Whatever it is, comment it. I don't care whether if its a bad one, i just want to know what you guys think, regardless whether i wrote it because i forgot.

Labels: Uncategorized

My fault.

Yes it is my fault.

For not studying Chemistry seriously for the first monthly test. Congrats to Li Li, for scoring high. I bet she's like one of the top students in her previous school.

I am not.

Sigh.

Carl Mann passed Chemistry too. Except me.

I think i am the lowest scorer for Chemistry of the whole form.

To any of my classmates who bumped into my blog or any Wesleyans: please do not say that you got the lowest. I know that i am the lowest, so, yeah.

I really regret for not studying.

My fault lah, really. There's too many chemical formula to remember. And as you guys know (my good friends), i hate memorizing things like crazy. That's one of the reasons why i hate History too. But some of the History facts are interesting.

I really have to study for the March term examination, and, my other monthly test subjects that i've yet to sit for. Gr.

Sometimes, i really do think that those pure Science subjects never fails to bore some of us. I feel sleepy automatically during Physics, and Chemistry. I've never felt sleepy for Biology before. But ever since that incident, goodbye awareness-during-Biology. Or maybe not. I don't think i'll feel more sleepy for any other subjects, because i want to pass. I don't want to fail anymore.

In fact, i've never failed in any subjects before - except Moral since Form 1. I've never liked Moral, because they're all in subjective form and it takes 2 hours for that paper. Gr i hate sitting long on chairs. Okay, fine, its impossible that i failed for Moral all the time. I passed before. The most i've ever gotten is...79%. Thats like...a B and a mark more to an A. How nice. That was in Form 2. I could score that much practically because the teacher gave those questions before in our exercise book, and i actually memorized a little from there.

How smart.

After that, i keep on failing because its not my teacher who set those papers anymore. I failed for Moral (okay maybe like 5 times altogether. i mean like an E) till last year. I got a B - finally because i studied for Moral. *sweat* I know i said i've never liked Moral. I don't know why, but i studied for it. Hmm i also wonder why.

Now, i don't care for what subjects i am taking, i am still going to study it. I don't care even if i hate that subject until i feel like killing that subject. I must study for all.

Even if i studied, i won't get good grades anyway. Sigh. As usual, i am a piece of failure.

Jasmine, i need you.

.
.
.

Since yesterday's a public holiday for Kuala Lumpur, its a whee for us Wesleyans as its like a...one stretch long holidays. From the 1st of February till the 10th of February. (HAR HAR PUTERIANS! I got holidays! Longer than you! Be jealous =P)

I don't care if it's a holiday or not, because if it's a public holiday for Kuala Lumpur only, and not for Seremban, it's an advantage. Simply because i get to go back to Seremban to collect those documents like academics report book, leaving certificate, and health report book. I know what i've missed out - extra curricular report book. I couldn't get it because, i didn't hand it in at all since Form 1. I don't like carrying so many books around on our extra curricular day - Wednesday, so i quite of...forgotten about it.

Until when teacher stressed how important it is to us last year, it was too late. I couldn't turn the time back, right? So i let it be. Until yesterday, again. Sigh. I didn't know where to get the extra curricular certificate, so my last year's Science teacher told me she'll help me if i have a photocopy of the report page. I don't know to say this, so, yeah, forgive me. Its just a page of it. Then i went and photocopied it.

Puteri's cool because Puteri got a photostating shop. Boo Wesley. But who cares about that shop anyway.

Anyway, i think i better start off with my day.

I woke up quite early as i couldn't sleep well because i was pretty excited in seeing my sexy friends. Seriously, i slept like at 2 something the night before. I turned and turned around on the bed, but i failed to sleep early.

Then i got ready, woke up my dad as he said he's going back to Seremban as well. I planned to leave at 9.30am. My dad, the smart ass, woke up late, and whatnot, made us left at 10am - which is like the break time for Puteri yesterday. I was quite frustrated after that for like approximately 5 minutes. I guess i really have short term things like - short term memory, short term anger, short term everything else. And yes, i am short too.

When i reached, i went to the office, to request for my leaving certificate. Darn, i've to hunt for my other documents. The school clerk asked who was my previous home room teacher, and i told her that my home room teacher left already and i told her my home room's teacher name too. Sigh.

Then she told me to fill in this form and all, then hunt for any counsellor teachers to get my documents. While filling it up, out of sudden, some bish poked me! I was like, "AH!" and she's like, "HELLO!" Guess who's that? Its that babi, Jasmine Kok. She said hi to my dad and all, and left to her respected spot to clean up.

Then i went hunting for the counsellor teachers.

I found Puan Inah, and she told me to find Puan Lai. Gr. Thank god that they're like...a few steps away from each other. If Puan Lai's in another side of the school, and Puan Inah is like at one corner of the school, i mean like, i don't know where they are, heck, i'll be dead alive.

Then, again, i've to fill a form up again. Then Puan Lai went and took those documents and all.

Gr. I took like...almost 2 hours to complete everything.

When school ended for them, we (the 7's except Joyce, me, and Jasmine Lee) went to A&W for lunch. We ordered things and bill came up to like RM70+ for the 8 of us. We talked and ate. Until we were like...dead full.

I still don't know why is there like, so many curly fries! Dang.

After lunch, we went to Parkson, to follow Kumi to finish her vouchers. We walked and walked, and found things!


At about 2.30pm, i sent Jasmine Lee and Jane back to school as they have sports practice.

So sedih.

That Jasmine lah, got tuition. Joyce was supposed to come at 2, but we adviced her not to as i might leave early. Sigh. Or else we'll have more fun things to talk about. Curse her choir.

Joyce Lau, hopefully we'll get to meet up. I'm missing you guys much now.

.
.

Sometimes when i am bored, i do wonder. I wondered how is he now, and whether does he really misses me. I can't speak to him, nor contact by any ways. Why must he go abroad? It hurts me deep inside.

If there's a chance, i would want him to come back. I feel super duper lonely, without him. I miss those times when he accompanied me, whenever i am sad, or happy. Now, i have no one to accompany me.

What a life.

Maybe i have to get used to this life.

Hopefully i'll get over him as soon as possible, so, i won't feel this sad.

.
.

PICTURES:

010208

Jane got me a birthday bear as a gift before i leave again!
I got this for Jasmine, and me. I got a darker pink for Jane as she like any tone of pink. Normally Jasmine and i get the same thing as it symbolize our sisterly love. =] I know it sounds homo.
D&G bag. Quote Weeru, "OH DOLL SEE GAR BAR NAAA!" Quote Jasmine, "imitation is scary."
Seriously ey. They were hugging me so tight. After this picture, Jasmine hugged me again and said, "i miss hugging you! You're so nice to hug!" *sweat* Jasmine, Jasmine.
While eating.
Geraldine, and KUMI!
They were taking a picture. & me, the pandai one, took this when they were posing.
This picture is hilarious!
Jasmine and i.
According to the rest, especially Jasmine, Katherine and Geraldine were lame. I say so too. They were using 2 sticks of french fries to create a cross. & they were taking a picture of it too!
Cool eh?
Jasmine and i. Thanks to the two people who kacau-ed Kumuta who was trying to take a picture. When the disturbance were over, Jasmine and i laughed, and this is the prouduct it.
This is the proper one, after Kumuta scolded them.
Me, Jane in the between, and Jasmine Lee. Jane was complaining about seeing her face ONLY in this picture.


other random ones that i've yet to post:

Moral of the picture: never play volleyball too much. By the way, it's Li Li's hand.
New year.
My grandma. What i am trying to emphasize about this picture is the effects. I swear i didn't do anything. The background, i meant.
I like the scene. Maybe i am over obsessed with skies now.
This is some random kid that Li Ling and i saw at the Gardens when we were out together a few weeks back. He was so adorable you know!


I guess thats all about pictures. =]

.
.

Rant:

People tend to judge me by reading my blog then, they'll spread things like i am not a nice person, and people will start to dislike me. Its your choice, seriously. You can say i am a type of girl that no one likes just because of my mouth. Its my blog. You have a friend to let your feelings out from your heart. I don't have one. I believe that 99% of you got a clique to share your feelings EVERY SINGLE DAY. I think its better for you to think about others. Don't think that everyone has a clique. I don't, really. My blog's my victim ever since i got a blog when i was in Form 1. Is that something wrong, or whatever, for me to let go my feelings here? I say what i want to say, i speak what i feel, thought and everything else in this blog. Its like my diary - online. One of my friend, understands me. She said i am straight forward. Yeah, i am straight forward. Is that a problem? Some people don't mind because it is in my nature. If you're like the miss-goody-two-shoes, its you. Its not like i can change you, or make you like me. We have our own characteristics. So what if i dislike Miss Teng - my Biology teacher for what she did? Hey, my anger are like for short term only. Its you, who don't understand. Go ahead and dislike me more, if it's better off for you. Some people, judges me by my look. Or the way i talk to them. Ah. I don't know how to start a conversation with someone new. If i talk to you like the way i speak to my friends-whom-i-know-for-ages, you wouldn't like it so soon as we just know each other. I am not like some other people (maybe there is not any) who just shows a good side in front of someone, and another at the back, which is like a miss-goody-two-shoes. If its you, sorry lah, i can do nothing about it. I still talk to you. I talk to everyone, even if i like or don't like them. It makes no difference. Yeah, i do get angry, and have a temper. Thats only for a short term. My short term is like less than 10 minutes. 10 minutes is too long. It should be lesser. I do count how long i get angry. Its up to you. Sometimes, i really don't know what to do. When i talk too much, you'll say i am TOO talkative and you'll dislike me. When i don't talk much, you'll say i am TOO quiet and i'm boring, and you'll start to dislike me again. When i don't crap like i do, you'll say i am so boring, and always being serious. When i crap, you'll say i crap too much. Sometimes, i feel like 'i better die off, so i won't feel lonely, and sad'. When i am sad, i have no one to talk to. Who do i have now? My blog. Although my blog is not a 'who', i still say its 'someone'. And that is how my blog became the victim for how i feel everytime. Some people accepts me for who i am, like the 7's. I swear they used to dislike me. Right, the 7's? If you don't believe, you ask them. Now, the 7's are like my best friends. If i am back in Seremban, at least i can bomb them with how i feel everyday. Because we share our feelings and stories every single day. And by that, i feel better than now. WAY BETTER ACTUALLY. But i have no choice because i am stuck in Wesley Methodist School for the rest of my 2 years. My dad paid the whole 2 years fees already. So, whats that called as? Dead, right? People thinks i am over reacting because i dislike redoing my work. Yeah, no one does like redoing work. Its abnormal for me to redo it for an exercise because i've never done it before. Even if i skipped a line, i'll do that particular line as a correction. I only dont mind redoing for PEKA/whatever coursework. I don't mind redoing PEKA for more than 10 times because it costs my life. BUT IF ITS AN EXERCISE, WTF OK. Its not normal for me. You've been there for 3 years, and i have only been in Wesley Methodist School for like, a month. Like what Corliss said, no one understands our feelings, as a Form 4 newbie. You all might think its the same how i went through during Form 1. Heck no. It is not. I've went through it during Form 1, as everyone got broke off when the new school reshuffled us. I had none of my previous classmates in that class. I was super lonely. But i didn't really are much as most of them are my previous schoolmates. There's new students, we talked, and became friends. I am a new student. Who can understand a newbie's feelings? NO ONE FROM SCHOOL. People might say, "new student is always like that, so just try to mix around." You tell me how to mix around, when everyone got a clique already? It's like so weird to be with the clique during breaks and all. Of course i'll feel like i am disturbing them, as i am new. They've been together since Form 1. Me? STILL A NEW KID NO MATTER WHAT. Most of the old students from Wesley doesn't care about saying hi to us, or whatever. The only people who asked for my name and so and so are like...less than 10! Maybe that's normal for every Form 4 newbies, even in a government school. To be honest, i miss those feelings of knowing every single student from Year 1 - Year 6. And, knowing everyone from Year 7 to Year 11. This is normal for every new student. I know. It takes time for me to familiarize with everything new. I am already ok with the school. Let me rate. Its about 6/10. More than half. I am already feeling ok with everything - the rooms, classes, food, people. I was feeling uber weird for the first 2 weeks, slowly, i am feeling better as i have friends like Corliss, Carl Mann, Amanda, Li Ling, Jia Huei, Li Li, Josephine, Teng Yi, and a few others. Corliss is like the closest to me among them. I mean, i trust Corliss more than the others. This is also another normal thing for a new student to feel. Sometimes, the old timers really can't understand how we newbies feel. Hmm. Maybe they will. I believe they will. Hmm if there's people dislike me for my rants, i am really commentless. Gosh, sometimes its really a priviledge for me to express my profound feelings here. Thank god i got a blog.

- Hmm. He's like taking 6 subjects only. I wonder why. Why are we taking so many subjects! >=( I think i am taking like...12-13 subjects.

Labels: Depression, Friends, Rants, Unforgettable